Thursday, July 31, 2008

Bad Mood

You know what really pisses me off?

When someone gives you a big blast of shit about something, you know, one of those 30 minute long sermons about how you did something that may end civilization as we know. Then you feel bad and try to apologize. Then the wang giving you greif says somethiong like....

"Oh, don't worry about it. It's not that big of a deal."

IF IT'S NOT THAT BIG OF A DEAL THEN WHY THE FUCK DID YOU EVER MENTION IT? Let alone the long winded pissing and moaning session. What are you just not happy unless you are bitching about something? Did you not get that red wagon you wanted for your 8th birthday and now you've decided to take revenge on everyone around you for the rest of your useless life?

Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Krispie & Whorie

As if work were not stressful enough with the prospects of being layed off soon and the fact that I need to stay focused and prove myself even more, I have a couple of co-workers who don't seem to like me much. They set around all day gossiping about me along with whispering to each other every time I walk by. They think I can't hear them, but the cubical walls are pretty thin. I hear every nasty thing they say about me.

Let me give you some back story so you can get the full picture.

If you have read my previous posts, you will know I have been combating several personal problems since my late teen years. Well, one of my problems is being nervous. Especially around people I don't know. This little problem comes from a hot June evening when I was 19 years old. I was working the late shift at a pizza shop as a delivery guy. I took a delivery to a not so nice part of town. When I arrived in the parking lot at this apartment building, I turned towards my passenger seat and tilted up the pizza box to double check the address. I then put the pizza back in the warming pouch and turned around to my left to the driver's door. As I did I felt the barrel of a gun push up against my temple. Then a not so friendly voice tells me in not so friendly words to hand over the money or I was going to die. Now, when you see something like this on television it doesn't really seem like much to you, but when some puts a 44 magnum close enough to your head that you can glance over and see the ends of the bullets in the cylinder and then they inform you that you are going to have your brains blown out for $27.39, it gives you a whole new perspective on people and trust.

This has relevance to the story in that at work all of us set in cubicles with low walls on them. Out of nervous habit, every time someone passes by my cube and I catch them in my peripheral vision, I have to look directly at them and see who it is. It's just an involuntary reaction that I don't realize I'm doing sometimes. This situation coupled with the fact that I am a quiet person at work I guess makes me out to be some sort of weirdo to some people.

Well, two of my co-workers, who we will call Krispie and Whorie for the sake of this conversation, some how think that since I look up to see who is passing by me that that makes me a pedophile or some twisted serial killing stalker or something to that effect.

So now these two women, and I use that term loosely, have made me the object of their childish gossip; making nasty comments about me on a regular basis. Some of which are very nasty and completely outlandish. The kind of things that could start rumors and get some one's otherwise good reputation tarnished severely.

Krispie is a late 20's or early 30's person who runs her mouth constantly. You cannot get her to shut up. The vast majority of what she says has nothing at all to do with work. She is extremely opinionated and very self absorbed. She acts like she is cranked up on cocaine most of the time. And of course, she is a gossip hound and a drama queen. This woman is so obnoxious that pretty much everyone in the work areas surrounding the administration area listen to headphones most of the day in a vain attempt in drowning her out.

Whorie is mid 40's to early 50's as an educated guess. She is the type that cannot seem to accept the fact that she is aging. She tries very hard to dress like a teenager, she wears here hair cut very short and died in very loud colors. And like Krispie, she is loud, opinionated, self absorbed and very rude. Also, she has the most annoying laugh. Try to imagine, if you can, what a barn owl would sound like if it were having a seizure in the midst of a full blown meth bender. That's what she sounds like. And she makes this disgusting sound loud enough to do structural damage to the building.

So, these two are the best of buddies. Whorie admiring Krispie for reminding her of what a bitch she was at her age and Krispie admiring Whorie for what a worthless cunt she could be in the future.

Now that I seem to be their favorite target, I get to put up with their snide comments, snickers as I pass by and get to be the spotlight of the office rumor mill.

You know what? I need this job but I'm about ready to have words with them whether I loose my job or not.

Monday, July 14, 2008

Work ....... Sort Of

I have been working for a Fortune 100 company in the Cleveland, Ohio area for the past six months through a temporary agency. I have worked hard to prove myself and finally was acknowledged by my supervisor as an outstanding employee. He kept promising me that I would be a permanent employee soon with a nice raise in pay and all the fringe benefits.

Well, today he informs me that the company has lost money the last two quarters and future business forecast isn't looking good. I may have a job until August or September at the latest.

This sucks more than a warehouse full of industrial strength vacuum cleaners. Just when I was finally on my own two feet again with things looking up, the rug is getting pulled out from under me. I can see it now, by fall I will be living off of unemployment benefits, renting a room off of my parents again, feeling like a maggot, and if I don't keep strong .......... back in the bottle.