Saturday, March 7, 2009

I'M BACK !!!

First I'd just like to say that if the Indians would have given the pilgrims a bobcat we'd be eating pussy on thanksgiving instead of a damned turkey.

With that said ..........

I have been doing fine. Thank you to those who wrote me and checked to see if I was O.K. . I've just been busier than a one legged man in an ass kicking contest. I'm working with a new band and trying to get some material recorded. I've been working like 100 hours a week. I'm writing a book of comedy short stories and I'm in the midst of trying to loose weight in a diet program.

Anyone who has myspace, my address is

OK, tales from the pizza man time now ......

This evening was a slow one. I was dispatched to deliver a couple of subs to a house on Moxahala Avenue. I pull up to the house and get out of the car when I notice two people across the street staring me down. It's an older gentelman, probaly in his 50's or early 60's, and a woman probaly in the same age range. The guy says "Hey buddy, can ya come here for a minute?" I could tell by his slurred speach that he was drunker than hell. I tell him no because I have to make a delivery to this house. He says ok and then I go about my business. While I'm on the porch of the house I'm delivering to, this fucker walks up on the porch behind me and waves at me. I turn and say hello. Them he walks up beside me and statrts talking to the young lady I'm delivering too. He asks her if her mom can give them a ride home because he knows her mom. She tells him that mom isn't there right now and he says OK and walks off the porch, nearly falling face first into the car that is parked in the drive way. She then looks at me kind of scared and says she has no idea who the hell that guy is. I complete the transaction and then walk back to my car parked along the curb. I get back to my car and start to get in when this same guy comes stumbling out of the darkness to the yellow line of the road, pulls his pants down, squatts and takes a shit right in the middle of Moxahala. The woman comes over a few seconds later and he wipes his ass with her sweater, they flaag down a cab passing by and leave.

Yeah, that was pretty fucking strange.

Sunday, November 2, 2008

Venting Anger: Part 2

I drive through our delivery area every night and see the same hookers and drug dealers working the streets. They are out there rain or shine. It could be 40 below zero and white out blizzard conditions and these fuckers are still working the street corners. Yet, the police drive by and say nothing. But, if I drive through the same area on deliveries more than twice in a one hour period, I get pulled over, yanked out of my car and treated like I'm Ted Bundy or something.

This particularly pisses me off considering that over the past 18 months several of our local law enforcement officials have been arrested for selling cocaine and other corruption charges. It was bad enough the feds sent in FBI agents to take down some of the local police people.

Furthermore, there have been a handful of women, all with arrests for solicitation, found dead and dumped in rural areas on the outskirts of the city. As far as we the public know, the police are not even close to solving these homicide cases.

Yet if I look out of place in a neighborhood while I'm simply doing my fucking job, then I get treated like a career criminal.

Venting Anger On A Thermo-Nuclear Level

Before i unleash my rage, let me explain that not all people who get free money every month are low life's. Every time I speak about free checks or Welfare, I also seem to be in the company of some hyper-sensitive asshole who goes crazy about me knocking people on welfare or disability. The fact of the matter is that those programs are in place to help people WHO DESERVE THEM and I DO NOT KNOCK EVERYONE WHO IS ON ONE OF THESE PROGRAMS. If you have a legitimate medical condition that keeps you from working, then yes public assistance programs were designed to help people like you. If you are a single parent struggling and need help until you get back on your feet, then you deserve to take advantage of these types of programs providing that you get off of the program when you can afford to take care of your household and you make an effort to do better for your household in order to get off of said program.

Now that I've said that, let me tell you what really pisses me off about disability and Welfare programs.

There are far too many people who milk these programs for thousands of dollars every year even though they have never worked a day in their life. I deliver to the housing projects for people on welfare and it pisses me off every time. For instance, the lazy bitch I delivered too tonight complained about having to pay $10 for a pizza. Yet, you look around her living room and she has new furniture, a nice high end computer system, a big screen LCD television, a $300 cell phone in her hand and she's wearing a pair of shoes that cost more than my entire outfit. She might be 22 or 23 years old, lives in a public housing apartment that my tax money paid to construct and continues to pay to maintain and she gets a free check every month from my tax money.

I get so angry at this kind of thing that it makes my blood boil. My idea of public assistance or welfare programs is that if you are on one of these programs you get just enough to get by. A safe, clean place to live, food and basic utilities. If you can afford to buy $2500 televisions and a whole living room full of new furniture, then you are either getting too much assistance or you don't need to be on welfare at all.

And there are so many of these people who are 2nd and 3rd generations welfare scrubbs who just will not make an effort to contribute to society. They just kick back and enjoy the free ride.

I wonder quite often what would happen to these people if you kicked them out on their sorry asses, took their kids and adopted them out to families that will raise them right and then just turned your back on them. I'm sure crime rates would go up, but we could take all of the money we are saving on welfare and give it to law enforcement agencies to take care of the problem.

Now on to disability benefits.

Everything seems to be a disability these days. Pretty soon anyone with a hang nail will be able to apply for disability so long as you have never worked in your entire life and have no plans to do so in the future.

My dad worked from the time he was 14 years old until he was forced to retire in 2002 because of serious complications of diabetes. He paid in to social security his entire working life. He got so bad at one point that he couldn't get out of bed and walk into the living room with out being completely exhausted. He ended up getting a lawyer and fighting. Finally after two years of court room battles he got his disability, which was merely his money that he paid in any way.

I've got a lazy piece of shit cousin who has never worked, been in and out of jail for as long as I can remember and is hooked on heroine. He gets disability now because they say he is too overweight to work and he suffers from depression problems.


Like I mentioned at the start of my rant, I don't mind helping out people who just need some support to get through a tough time in their life or are too old to work or have a legitimate health problem that keeps them from working. But, the rest of those douche bags need to start contributing or get the fuck out.

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

My Political Post Before The Big Election

This is the only time I am going to mention the election, so here are my thoughts.

After study both of the candidates for months and trying to be as open as I could through the process, I have come to a final determination. The Mcain/Palin ticket sucks and the Obama/Biden ticket sucks, just in a different way.

I am voting for a third party candidate. I don't care if it's a former porn star with a 700 pound shut-in for a running mate. I urge you to do the same.

Please, do not vote for Mcain or Obama.

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Commanders Log: Part One

The following are a summary of the events which took place on October 12, 2008 involving Transport #28 under my command of said vessel.

At 17:45 hours I arrived at Three and a Half Star Pizza to take command of transport #28 and it's night shift duties. After a routine safety and equipment inspection I was ready to take my first run of the evening. As luck would have it, my first drop off would be a routine stop at a local crack cocaine distribution dwelling in sector eight. While the possibility of danger could be high, typically the inhabitants were quite over joyed to see me and their well done Italian subs swimming in vinegar. This evening would prove to be a typical transaction.

I navigated my ship down Lender Avenue, took a right on McGuire Boulevard, topped the hill and took a left onto Continental Drive. As I entered sector eight, I turned right onto Jackson Street and gazed upon a usual sight. A broken down single floor structure with peeling forest green paint. In the front yard lie many pieces of household furniture in poor repair and a little boy , five or possibly six years of age, trying to force a pine cone up a stray dog's rectum. A site I had seen every day for nearly three weeks.

After bringing my transport to a halt in the designated loading and or unloading zone behind the collection of soiled diapers that must have massed fifteen metric tons, I exited with the package. Not more than a split second after putting my first boot onto turf I was greeted by the loud, shrieking voice of the lady of the house.

“Hey mutha fuka, you got my shit?” she inquired as her large framed lumbered out of the rear exit of the structure, struggling hard to stay within the confines of her spandex outfit that made her appear as sixteen kilograms of fecal material compressed into a four kilogram capacity container.

“Good evening madame, your requisition has been filled and delivered in a satisfactory time frame.” I replied with a pleasant smile on my face.

“Dem god damn subs betta have extra dressin on dem or else deir gonna be some chaos up in dis bitch.” she rebutted.

“I assure you that your order has been filled to specification. We at Three and a Half Star Pizza pride ourselves on quality and customer service.” I explained.

A'ight, lets do dis shit mafuka.” she stated as she began counting pennies out of a plastic condiment bowl.

“Your invoice total is $15.97 ma'am” I explained in a friendly tone.

At this point the lady placed the pennies back into the bowl, closed the lid upon it and threw the entire collection at me. Then she abruptly yanked the sandwiches from my hand and yelled “Fifteen dolla and ninety-seben cent is sum bullsheit. Count dat shit on ya own. If ya lucky dey may be a tip fo ya.”

She then turned and walked quickly back into her home. I retrieved the container with the currency in it and returned to my transport. I then poured the coins into my collection case and threw the bowl onto the floor with the rest of the containers she had hurled at me in the past days .........

To Be Continued

Thursday, October 9, 2008

Random Questions

I happen to be a working class heterosexual white male of legal voting age. When did everything become my fault?

Why is it that every time there is something wrong with my car every dip shit who has ever seen a ratchet thinks they can tell me how to fix it and their way of fixing it is way better than anyone else's?

On that same note, why is it that there is always one asspipe who insists you do it his way because his uncle has been a mechanic for 25 years? Maybe his uncle would be a prime candidate to consult on auto repair issues, but jerking off hamsters at the local petsmart and merely being related to a mechanic does not make you a fucking master automotive technician.

What is it with people being too lazy to pronounce an entire word? Like people who say "wit" instead of "with" or people who say "dis" instead of "disrespected". Do people actually think that makes them "hip" or "cool"? To me it sends up a red flag that the individual is either too fucking stupid or too lazy to pronounce the entire word. When people come into work talking like that and wanting to fill out a job application I throw it in the trash when they are done. I don't want to work with an idiot or a lazy bastard.

Why is our society more interested in protecting some one's frail sense of being than getting the truth out into the light and doing the right thing? The Pooper incident is a prime example of this. He stole from the company. Did he get punished? No he didn't because he's an old man in his early 60's and the company didn't want to "pick on him". What a bunch of bullshit. If he'd been my age they would have fired him and then took legal action. If you do something wrong you should be punished for it regardless of you age, gender, religious beliefs, race or any of that other petty shit.

Monday, October 6, 2008

Hookers, Prostitues and Crack Whores

I work in a not so nice city. The economy around the area has been hit really hard since the recession has started. Unemployment is through the roof. Therefore, a lot of women have turned to "selling themselves" to make a living. I was delivering last night in the downtown area when I was flagged down by a hooker not four blocks from both the city police station and the county sheriff's office. I, of course, did not part take in her services. I like the company of women like most other guys, but I do not like the possibility of getting arrested or catching something that modern science is yet to identify.

Tonight I was out on delivery in a not so nice neighborhood and drove past a ran down apartment building where apparently one of the working girls had just finished with a client. She walked out the door onto the steps bare assed naked, picked up her clothes and started putting them back on and motioned me to come over and talk to her. Again, I did not partake.

My point is this, my town isn't that big. It only has about 25,000 people in it. I have noticed a large surge in violent crime, drug dependency and prostitution over the last year or so. The economy is not getting better and I feel it will get worse before it gets better, if it ever does. I think as money gets tighter and more and more women are out of work they are going to start turning to this type of "employment" more often.

The police did a big sting operation and arrested like 12 of these women about a year ago. They said in the local paper that they figured that they had 15 to 20 girls that they knew for sure were working the streets. I bet since that time, there are 3 to 4 times as many out on the streets. To make matters worse, since the city, county and state have all had major budget cuts and gas prices are through the roof, you don't see but about 20% of the police patrol that you once did.

I think my hometown is headed right down the old crapper.